How To Catch And Keep A Man
It is quite unfortunate that over 80 percent of every relationship end in heart break. What is more worrisome is the fact that each gender blames it on the other. Ladies believe that men are cheats by nature. You can never satisfy a man. He must cheat on you. Men also feel that ladies are also to blame.
Things will continue that way until each gender admits its own fault. As hard as it is to keep a man, some ladies have been able to catch and keep theirs. How did they do it? They must have done some things differently. This article will help you catch and keep your man.
This article dwells more on keeping a man as catching a man is quite easy, keeping him is the almost impossible part. Once you are beautiful, presentable and you have nice manners, men will definitely come for you. It is left for you to decide on the kind of man to date and the ones to turn down.
What exactly do you want in him?
Your choice of boyfriend should be determined by what you actually want in the relationship. This article assumes that you intend to catch a man and keep him for marriage and then raise a family with him. Go for a serious minded man, who has a plan for his future not a party-going, hot, ladies’ man without any idea of future ambition. A date with either type of men is enough for you to identify each of them.
Approach him if he does not come first
If you see a serious minded man that catches your fancy, there is nothing wrong in approaching him yourself. It is not written anywhere that only men must approach women. Some ladies are of the opinion that you will be cheapening yourself when you do that. It is not true. Think of it this way, you approached a guy that you like and you have also turned down the advances from several other men. Are you really cheap?
In reality, the man may initially see you as being cheap. But while dating each other, different men will definitely ask you out on several occasions at different locations. In fact, more handsome and richer guys will ask you out too. But when you turn down all of them because you are already in a relationship, you will begin to earn the respect from your man. Approaching him is better than using subtle means to seek his attention. Another lady could approach him first
Nobody is perfect and you will definitely disagree to agree. But you don’t have to complain about every mistake. You are his girlfriend and not his teacher. Nothing tires a man out like constant nagging. Learn to overlook some issues. Even the few ones you choose to talk about, make them brief and don’t appear confrontational. This is one of what men want from their woman. How will you feel when your man complains too much?
Imagine how you will treat your man if no other man had approached you all your life and the ones you approached all turned you down? He will be too special huh? You will be so tolerant and you will satisfy him with everything. This implies that every lady has a little bit of ego issues. You complain and confront your man over issues that you can easily overlook because you feel other men are waiting in line for you. To keep him, you have to treat him like he is the only man that has ever noticed your presence.
Women often forget that the competition for their man does not end especially if he is handsome and rich. So you have to always “dress to kill”. You have an advantage over the other ladies. You already know exactly the kind of dressing and carriage that turns him on. Other ladies will only take a general approach. You have to match up to other ladies seeking his attention. What you can’t tolerate from him will be tolerated by several other women even though it may be temporary.
Assume that he is trustworthy
Although it is difficult to trust a guy you have just started dating. But learn to believe whatever he tells you. Don’t always jump to the conclusion that he is cheating on you. Apart from that, don’t appear to be monitoring him all around. This is one of the reasons why men withdraw from a relationship very early. Learn to trust him in words and deed.
Be as transparent as possible
Give your man access to your phone. Let him feel free to check your messages. This is the best way to prove to him that you don’t have anything to hide. He will check your phone in the first few weeks of your relationship, but he will get tired especially when you always leave the phone around him. However, ones he notices that you have stopped dropping your phone, the urge to start checking it will build up again.
When your phone rings and he is around don’t walk away to receive the call. The first thing that will come to his mind is that the call is from another man. Even if you have to ignore a call in his presence, explain the details to him. Also explain why you won’t pick the call. Don’t let him feel he is the reason you are not picking the call.
Avoid passing half information like “I went to visit someone”, “I went to see a friend” or “I was on the phone with someone”. Don’t leave him to the mercy of his imaginations. Instead, you should give complete information like “I went to see Jane, a colleague who had an accident” and “I was on the phone with Jerry, my cousin”. Men love transparency so much. The fact that most ladies aren’t transparent makes the few transparent ones champions. Why not join them?
Ask for his assessment of you once in a while
It works wonders to ask your man to assess you once in a while. Tell him that you want to know in which areas you are doing well and the areas where you need to improve. The fact that you are making so much effort to please him will make him love you much more. However, there is a little caveat to this. You need to work on his assessment. Why else would you ask for an assessment when you don’t intend to work on it? You need to make efforts towards improving in the areas he scored you low. In fact, it may boomerang if he doesn’t see your efforts. He will likely think you were mocking him. And he may not respond when next you ask for his assessment.
When things go wrong, take responsibilities and don’t trade blames
Trading blames will make your man point out your faults too and it will end in quarrels. But when you take responsibilities, he will switch to the mode too. Take this scenario, when you forget a glass cup on the edge of the table and your boyfriend mistakenly hits it and it dropped and broke. Instead of blaming him for hitting the cup, take responsibility for leaving it at the edge. He will also take responsibility for hitting the cup. This is why understanding a man his very important.
When things go right, share the credit with him
Whenever you achieve anything great, you need to share the credit with him even if his contribution is minimal. For instance, if you pass your examinations in flying colors, thank him for giving you enough time to read. Thank him for being understanding. Little things like this will draw him closer to you.
Don’t abhor jealousy
Moderate jealousy is important in every relationship. So, you should be happy when your man is a little jealous when he sees you with other guys. Instead of flaring up, give him reassuring words. Let him know that the other guys don’t compare to him in your heart. But when your boyfriend is not perturbed when he sees you with other men, it could be an indication that your relationship is only temporary. May be all he wants from you is sex and as long as you oblige him whenever he needs it, he doesn’t care who else makes love to you.
Work on your sexual performance
A guy might love you and still cheat on you. Ladies usually mix these two up. May be he loves you but you are not doing enough to meet his sexual appetite. So, you need to work on giving him a mind-blowing sexual satisfaction all the time. Make it difficult for any lady to entice him with superior sexual performance. Since men are naturally adventurous with sex, try to explore different sexual positions. Placing restrictions or avoiding certain sexual activities only makes sex with you boring. And what do you think will happen when he meets a lady who is ready to give it all?
Learn to forgive him for cheating
If your boyfriend cheats on you, learn to forgive him for only two times. If he does it the third time, you can break up completely. That is if you have made necessary effort to improve your sexual performance. When you catch him cheating on you with another lady, forgive him the first two times. But learn to ask him what you were not doing well. Whether he complains about sex or not, improve on it. It matters in a relationship a lot. Breaking up with him will only allow the other lady to win him over completely.
Make yourself indispensable to him
Get deep into his life. Try to share his problems, help him with his laundries and do a lot of things that will make it difficult for him to forget about you. Even if he breaks up with you, he will likely come back when he realizes that you mean much more than a mere girlfriend to him.
Watch the way he treats his sisters
Instead of trying to compete for your boyfriend’s attention with his sisters, watch the way he treats them. He will definitely treat you same way in future. If he is so nice to his sisters, you are lucky. He is the right man. But if he yells at his sisters often or quarrels with them regularly, you had better discuss it with him because he will treat you the same way in future.
Make his friends your friends
Instead of trying to separate him from his friends, get to know them and let them like you. When they do, it makes it even more difficult for him to dump you completely. Whenever you have a quarrel, they will try to mediate. But if you make it obvious that you don’t like them or you don’t give a damn about them, when there is a rift between both of you, it will simply be none of their business.
In conclusion, how many women can adopt these tips? Take the time and work on them and you will always have your man where you want him.